13 June 2016, 1 pm
Thinking that lunch will involve more buffet-style croissanterie and coffee-throwing, I forget to turn up at the start. By the time I arrive, everyone else is seated and half-way through their starter. There is one free table, with twelve places set, and I am the only person on it. This is not good for my street cred. Two of the AIPLA people kindly bring their plates and sit either side of me, whether to keep me company or to keep me in check I am not sure. Either way, I am grateful. They proceed to have a debate about Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton, from which it emerges that it is a Good Thing that I am sitting between them as otherwise there might be a fight. I eat my salad and brush fluff off my skirt, like a good Brit, and every now and then I throw in a comment about the weather which, although rainy, is at least not the fault of either of the US Presidential candidates. After lunch, we all check our smartphones again, to the accompaniment of various presentations on US IP law. In particular we learn about means-plus-function language in US patent claims. Apparently it is no good trying to pretend that a signalling unit or a signalling system or even a signal box is any better than a “signalling means”. It is in fact better to fill your claims with as much waffle as possible, like I do, for example “a light or a bell or something a bit similar”. (I am available on a consultancy basis, should you want to outsource your international drafting and prosecution work.)
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