3 February 2016, 2 pm
At the Congress Steering Committee meeting this morning, we made Cunning Plans about the date and venue and timings and content for this year’s Congress. In fact, we pretty much got it all sewn up. Unfortunately the date is slap bang in the middle of the Oktoberfest, which means that certain people will be unable to come to Congress unless we pick them up bodily from a beer tent the night before, shove them on an overnight shuttle bus to London and fly them straight back to the tent with a fistful of paracetamol once the CPD bit’s over. Personally I think that could be made into a selling point for the event. We then held an Internal Governance Committee meeting, at which Mr Davies revealed his Cunning Plan for where CIPA is to live when the lease on 95 Chancery Lane expires and the landlord attempts to renegotiate the rent at current market rates. The current market rate for dowdy, red-walled office space on Chancery Lane, with integral damp patches and carpet stains, is apparently nearly double what it was when we moved in. Mr Davies’s Cunning Plan involves moving to somewhere else where we would be (a) more welcome and (b) less fleeced, and where we could have proper usable office space rather than paying £exorbitant per square foot for a badly-carpeted corridor facility. The biggest problem with this Cunning Plan is how we would move the CIPA crest and the massive list of past presidents, which appear to be structurally embedded in the walls of CIPA Hall like fossils. If we attempt to remove them, we might well take large chunks of the Hall with us, which would leave the landlord with a badly-carpeted corridor leading to a dowdy, red-walled abyss. And then, says Mr Davies, our Deelapidayshuns would be very high indeed. I left the IGC meeting to go for coffee with a couple of fellow Council members. This does not involve any Cunning Plans at all, other than the one about how a small person in a smart skirt can reach the summit of a coffee shop bar stool without an undignified tearing sound announcing the loss of yet another hemline and the reappearance of leg parts that have been rightly hidden from view since 2010.
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